Sunday, June 22, 2008

Family Wars: The Alienation of Children

















The parents of Amy (age 10) and Kevin (age 7) are divorcing after 13 years of marriage. Their father, by temporary stipulation, has moved from the marital home. He is entitled to visit with the children on alternating weekends and one evening, during the week. Soon, the children begin to refuse to go with him. At first, they do not want to leave Mom; they say that they are afraid to go. When Dad comes to the house, Mom tells him that she\he will "not force the children to go." "Visitation is up to them." and she\he will "not interfere in their decision". The children refuse to talk with him on the phone. Mom calls him names when he telephones and complains constantly about her financial situation, blaming him, all within hearing of the children.

Dad attempts to talk with the children about the situation, then to bribe them with movies, shopping trips, toys. They become more and more sullen with him and resistant to coming. Anything, routine doctor visits, invitations from a friend, a visit to Aunt Beth, serves as an excuse to avoid visits.

A court appointed guardian ad litem learns from the children that "Dad is abusive and mean to us. " They do not want to go on visits. However, when asked to give specific examples of how he is abusive, their stories are not convincing, "He yells too loud when we make noise." "He made me climb all the way to the top of a mountain." "He gets mad at me about my homework." "He makes me wear my bike helmet." "He pounds the wall to get us up in the morning and it makes me afraid that he'll hit me." They say that he has never hit them, although they state that they are very afraid that he will.

These children are in the process of becoming alienated from their father.

An increasing number of children are experiencing the divorce of their parents or litigation over their custody some time during their minority. Some children experience the concerted, albeit often unconscious or unintended, attempt of one parent to alienate them from their other parent. It is the purpose of this article to alert lawyers, judges and parents involved in divorce and custody wars to the serious nature of parental alienation and to provide suggestions for court based intervention.

I. Definitions
II. Harm to The Child
III. Motivation for Alienation
IV. Recognition of Alienating Behaviors

A. The Continuum: Distiquishing between"typical Divorce and "Alienation"
B. Mild
C. Moderate
D. Overt
E. Severe

1. Prevention
A. Education
B. Attorneys
C. Courts
2. Mild Alienation cases
3. Moderate
4. The Parent Evaluation
5. Severe: The Fully Enmeshed Child
6. Conclusion

Information provided by:Dr. Peggie Ward located at http://www.divorcesource.com/NH/DS/ward.html

Go to: New Hampshire Articles and Resources

Link - Divorce Source: Family Wars: The Alienation of Children

Here we go, of course I have to give my two cents...

Lets say my children were the topic of this article it would then read something along the lines of ..

The parents of Steven Uccio (age 15) Dawn Uccio (age 13) Louis Uccio (age 8) Nicholas Uccio (age 6) have separated and will one day be divorcing after nearly 20 years of an abusive marriage.

Their Father, originally by temporary stipulation, then by final order of protection after a full hearings, has moved from the marital home. As per the mothers final restraining order he is entitled to visit with the children on alternating weekends and one evening, during the week.

Their Mother, was naive and felt bad for their father so when he came to the house often to see the children, she allowed him to visit the children whenever he wanted so long as he didn't fight with her.

The Father refused to pay his court ordered child support.

The Mother ended up in a hospital because of a mistake in her and her daughters prescription drugs on one of these uninvited visits with the father when he refused to leave and began arguing with the mother.

The children stayed with the Father for two weeks while the Mother was in the Hospital.

The father brought false child abuse charges against the Mother.

ACS falsely "indicated Mother" tricking Mother into losing her children.

False ACS case would be overturned SIX YEARS later when Mother became aware of it.

Mother and children had a great relationship as they always had when she got out of the hospital, as witnessed in the picture above taken after her discharge from the hospital.

Mother was unable to get Father's child support onto a calendar in New York the clerks claimed it wasn't transferred from NJ yet.

Eventually, thirty eight thousand dollars owed to Mother in back Child Support disapeared behind closed doors.

Mother was homeless living off the good graces of family and friends after 9-11 and the destruction of her ability to earn a living in the hotel food and beverage business, so children lived with Father.

Father continued his self employment and his second job working for the CYO under the direction of Joseph Panepinto.

Father met Aggie Panepinto.

Soon, the children begin to refuse to go with Mother.

At first, they told Mom that Dad didn't want her there; they say that they don't want to go with her.

Mom brings the case to Richmond County Family Court.

Hearing Officer Bonnie Cohen Gallet, and Staten Island Family Court Services forensic evaluator Kathlene Amorose labeled Mother a dangerous drug addict, yet both DENIED Mother drug testing.

Mother went to her Hotel H.R. Director and asked to be drug tested and was drug tested by Quest labs. Hair drug test taken.

Negative hair drug test results brought to the court by Mother was critically precluded from evidence.

Hearing Officer Gallet, left Father in charge of contacting Mother with schedules of the children's after school activities (that was the only visitation Mother was allowed- YET Mother had LEGAL CUSTODY- Father had a BULL-SHIT FALSE ACS case on his side that was also CRITICALLY PRECLUDED from the record - Mother had NO IDEA)

Mother and children were kept apart by Hearing Officer Gallet for EIGHTEEN MONTHS!

Fahter and his girlfriend Aggie Panepinto had the children to themselves without Mother allowed to see or speak to the children for eighteen months.

When Mother went to court to find Father in contempt for not allowing Mother to visit with children, Father tells the court that he will "not force the children to go." "Visitation is up to them." and he will "not interfere in their decision".

The children refuse to talk with mother. The phone number Mother had for the children had been changed from the main phone number. Father put that phone line in his bedroom and forwarded all calls to his cell, Father got a NEW phone number for the main phone line.

Dad was ORDERED to stop bad mouthing mom in writing in Moms life long Order of protection: "NO DISPARAGING REMARKS."

They become more and more sullen with Mom and resistant to visiting.

A court appointed guardian ad litem learns from the children that "Mom is abusive and mean to us. " They do not want to go on visits. However, when asked to give specific examples of how she is abusive, their stories are not convincing, Blah Blah Blah.

They say that she will hit them, although all 4 prior calls to ACS from the Father about the Mother were unfounded, they state that they are very afraid that she will hit or yell at them if they were forced to visit.

The Mother would spend years in court with out prevailing in getting ANY ORDER to see her children YET EVERY THING the court used against the Mother was HEARSAY! NOT ONE OUNCE OF PROOF!

These children are in the process of becoming severely alienated from their Mother.

An increasing number of children are experiencing the divorce of their parents or litigation over their custody some time during their minority. Some children experience the concerted, albeit often unconscious or unintended, attempt of one parent to alienate them from their other parent.

It is the purpose of this article to alert lawyers, judges and parents involved in divorce and custody wars to the serious nature of parental alienation and to provide suggestions for court based intervention.

Mother has not figured out why she has been unsuccessfully in having contact with her children through a court order.

Mother found out that ...

Fathers Boss Joseph Panepinto is married to Supreme Court Judge Barbara Panepinto.

Mother noticed that Fathers boss and Fathers girlfriend share the same last name (Panepinto)

Mother wonders if she and her children have been a victims of this apparent political connection and have been kept out of each others lives because of it.

Mother found out that Fathers Boss Joseph Panepinto is married to Judge Barbara Panepinto.
Judge Barbara Panepinto's employment history included work with every agency/ or in every field and or court the family has been involved in.

Mother pleads with her children to read the links on this page (especially Overt , Severe, and Harm to The Child,) then, think for themselves after reading this short version of what happened and KNOW they were alienated with the help of many players under color of law. (legally -Illegal)

Mother also pleads with any of their friends that may come across this article to use their own mind to see why her and her children have been separated and help her get back together with each other!

1 comment:

dollslikeus said...

It is to bad parents try to turn the child against the other parent hate destroys people only love will build a bridge to their future . Parents need to go to counselling after a divorce .
To make sure the child loves both parents and neithoer of them try to turn the child against the other parent.