Sunday, November 30, 2008

Police: St. Johns boy vowed 1000th spanking would be limit

UPDATED FROM -

Prosecutor seeks to drop charge against young murder suspect

Experts: Interrogation of boy, 8, 'out of bounds' Priest: Slain father taught boy to use guns

Child, 8, accused of killing father, another man

RAW: 8-year-old murder suspect's interview with police

Experts: Abuse is often cause when kids kill parents, but motive in Ariz. case remains unclear

Mother Baffled in Arizona Murders

Psychological tests sought for boy accused of slayings

Gag Order Issued In 8-Year-Old's Murder Trial

Prosecutors Say Boy Methodically Shot His Father

Arizona police aim to put eight-year-old on trial as an adult for shooting deaths

8-Year Old Charged With Two Counts of First Degree Murder

Boy, 8, Arrested in Death of Two Adults, Including Dad

Police: St. Johns boy vowed 1000th spanking would be limit

An 8-year-old St. Johns boy charged with double-homicide may have kept a written record of spankings by his parents, vowing that the 1,000th would be his limit, according to a police records released Friday.

A search affidavit by Sgt. Lucas Rodriguez says the child "is believed to have made ledgers and or communicated in the form of writings about his intentions. (The boy) told a CPS . . . worker that when he reached one thousand spankings . . . that would be his limit. (The boy) kept a tally of his spankings on a piece of paper."

In a statement to police a day after the Nov. 5 killings, the boy said he had been spanked the day before the shootings because he did not complete a school assignment.

The juvenile is charged with shooting his father and a family friend, 39-year-old Timothy Romans, at the family's home in St. Johns.

According to the police records, family members were not surprised when told one day after the slayings that the boy had confessed to murder. Police Chief Roy Melnick says in his report, "I comforted them as best we could. After several minutes, (the boy's grandmother) shouted out in an angry and loud tone, 'I knew this would happen. They were too hard on (the boy). I knew (he) did it. He spent the night in my bed cuddling up to me. I had a feeling he did it. If any eight year old boy is capable of doing this, it's (him).'

"She then started to tell me something and then stopped herself. She took several deep breaths, wanting to tell me more but stopped herself."

Melnick says the grandmother then said the boy's stepmother suspected the child that night. At that point, the child's grandfather added, "If any eight year old was capable of doing this, (the 8-year-old) was." And the grandmother said, "I knew this was going to happen, they were too hard on (him)."

The Arizona Republic is not naming the boy or his family members due to the suspect's age.

Search warrant records are contained in a police report made available by the Apache County Attorney's Office.

The case file contains other revelations, including statements from friends that Romans and the boy's father had been involved in disputes with co-workers at the nearby power plant, and with men at a local bar.

Records indicate the 8-year-old had no history of psychiatric care and was not on any medications. The search warrant affidavit contains the first public disclosure that the child had been in contact with Child Protective Services workers. CPS cases are confidential, and an Apache County Superior Court judge has imposed a gag order, so the timing and context of his statement remains unclear.

The search warrant return does not appear to list any kind of spankings ledger among items recovered from the family residence. It does note that evidence includes a spelling worksheet with blood on it and a white sheet of paper labeled, "Story (boy's first name) the Family."

One day after the killings, the boy gave police a statement which they have characterized as a confession. In it, he provided various explanations for what had happened, finally declaring that he had shot his father and the other man twice each to stop their suffering after they had been wounded by an unknown person.

At the end of the interview, the boy curled into a fetal position and hid his face. When asked what he was thinking, he told investigators, "Going to juvie."

Police: St. Johns boy vowed 1000th spanking would be limit

THE LATEST as of this week...

Mom: Boy charged with killing father 'loved his dad' - CNN.com

Attorneys see flaws in murder case against 8-year-old


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Dead foster child’s Oklahoma family will hold separate service

The biological family of a 5-year-old boy who was hit by a car and killed while in state Department of Human Services custody will not be allowed to attend his funeral and burial, but the state is granting them a private memorial service.

John Brian Gifford, who was in the care of a foster family, died Tuesday when he was hit by a car that a 13-year-old girl had started to warm the engine. Investigators said the girl accidentally allowed the vehicle to roll back when she started it, and when she pulled it forward again, she ran over the boy.

The families are not allowed to know the day and time of the funeral and burial. Parents Samantha Jo Cleary of Oklahoma City and Melvern Gifford of Midwest City were divorced before they lost custody of John, but both sides of the family said they are thankful they can say their goodbyes at 2 p.m. Sunday at Sunny Lane Funeral Home.

Grandmother ‘just about came unwound’

Nita Havlik, John’s paternal grandmother, said she was reminded how much she needed closure when she went shopping for Christmas gifts Friday.

"I was picking up things for the grandchildren, and I had subconsciously tried to buy the baby a Christmas present before I realized I couldn’t do that and just about came unwound in the store,” she said. "I just had to leave after that.”

The grandmother said she is not allowed to see or buy gifts for John’s three brothers who are still in foster care, and she does not expect to get to see them at the service.

"I don’t even know if the other children even know their little brother is gone, and no one is going to tell us if they know,” she said.

Samantha Cleary said she and her mother, Dewanna Cleary, also are thankful DHS is allowing them to hold a service with their own minister and song choices, but Samantha Cleary said she would really like to see her other four children who are still in DHS custody.

"I still need to know that they are OK,” she said.

Havlik said she is glad DHS allowed the biological family to put together a memorial service rather than just letting them walk in and walk out for a viewing, but she had criticism of DHS — describing its power as unchecked.

"I still want to make the public aware that DHS has so much control that they can manipulate your life and never even look you in the eye,” she said. "I want people in Oklahoma to wake up and realize this could happen to you. All someone has to do is tell something ugly about you.”

Dead foster child’s Oklahoma family will hold separate service NewsOK.com

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Thanks LK for sharing this story

Friday, November 28, 2008

Something interesting happened today on the way to the office

If you've ever found yourself saying "Oh no .. not again" in any relationship/friendship..or you're an abused partner/ or an alienated parent... then this entire post is a Must read!

Something interesting happened today as I was on my way to the office...

Ok so I don't really have an "office" but I might as well..

I spend countless hours here at my computer researching and researching reading and dissecting what I've read.. and if you saw my computer desk.. it looks like the average "office space" so therefore I feel.. ahemmmm "entitled" to call this my office...

(Go ahead laugh...the word "entitled" is not a word you would use to describe me if you knew me .. but emphasized here to make you smile- note to self.. "entitled" is the underlying problem.. but you already knew that)

So on that note and keeping with the ... On my way to the office story .. we can pretend the space I work in .. is my dayum office... ok? (smile)

Now back to the story ...

Before I begin a post I go to my blogger dashboard where .. I read the posts of those bloggers that I follow...before I begin what I actually came online to rant about...

Today one of the bloggers I follow (Parental Alienation) posted an article about (Actions speak louder than words) being this is a major problem in my personal life... I don't think there is anything that will piss me off more.. or faster than someone who's words don't match their actions...on a consistent basis.

I figured I'd go check out her views on this topic..

She has excellent views.. (of course they're excellent because they are the same as MY VIEWS) hahaha .. ok ok so that was intended to make you laugh.. but in all seriousness..

I wanted to leave a comment.. I wanted to point out that there's a "madness in two" that plays a major role in parental alienation.. as she so brilliantly alluded to..

I believe more and more target parents are "getting it" by blogging or sharing our views with others on either alienating parents or target parents ... the message is becoming clear... at the base of alienation is a personality disorder.

Whether or not we want to accept it.. alienating children from one parent isn't something new, it's been discussed in books that were written in the 1940's as I pointed out in my post..
Disgusted with the system: The life-long lasting effects of PAS noted in 1948?

Right here it would be easy for me to go off on a tangent on why alienating has become such a hot topic.. but I'll refrain the best I can from doing that...

Anywho.. my point about alientaing not being something new .. takes me to the thought of.. well if this (alienating children) isn't something new .. then obviously we the public are dealing with adults that were alienated as children.. and well.. they must have turned out ok.. right?

Apparently they are functioning in society as adults and no-ones the worse for it.. right?

WRONG!

If you follow my posts.. you will see that..

(1) I freely admit to having been raised by a Malignant Narcissist who was married to the other parent.. who was a Co-Dependent...hence my Dysfunction.. which led me to marry what I call a Malignant Narcissist/Psychopath (he refuses to be tested)

(2) I've fully accepted my role in where I am today and why...

(3) I know the damage I've allowed to happen to my alienated children due to what was then MY dysfunction.

(4) I've worked my ass off to not only come to terms with .. but understand and change what MY role was/is.. aka ... MY dysfunction....

(5) Without years and years of therapy.. these realizations could never have been...

(6) I accept that I will be drawn to dysfunction if I'm not very very careful.

(7) I accept that I probably have residual in my life from when I hadn't figured it all out yet...

Why the hell am I confessing MY ROLE in all this?

Why is MY ROLE so dayum important anyway?

What if I NEVER accepted MY ROLE.. in why my children were alienated?

What if I never accepted MY ROLE in why I find/have found myslef drawn to dysfuction?

I could easily sit here and say .. Oh don't blame the victim (like some love to say) It's not MY fault.. that so and so did .. such and such..

WRONG AGAIN!

IT MOST DEFINITELY IS MY FAULT.. and if your a regular reader of this blog because you find yourself in those situations (being abused- or taken advantage of- or alowing someone to get away with (insert whatever works or isn't working in your life) more often than not.. I'd like to challenge you to find YOUR ROLE.. in why...

Without MY HELP.. aka MY ROLE in this .. there couldnt have been the madness in two...

And I'll leave you to this site .. to figure it out for yourself...

Folie รก Deux: The Exquisite Madness of the Family (Family Court Philosopher #79): Get Off the Bus, Gus!

The above site is a MUST READ .. IF you plan on changing why you keep getting into "those situations" or why .. why ... why .. whatever is always happening to YOU....

Right about now.. I'm thinking .. maybe it's not such a bad thing that I've always questioned authority..and thought outside the box..perhaps that's what saved me.. even if it was almost too late.. or maybe it was because it was almost toooooooooo late. I don't think you/us/whoever will begin to question what they believe until it's toooooooooo late. Why rock the boat .. isn't this the way you've operated right along.. and if so.. you probably haven't figured out YOU PLAY A ROLE .. ad a matter of fact YOU PLAY THE MOST IMPORTANT ROLE.. IN YOUR LIFE! Anything less.. is allowing yourself to be a victim of circumstances isn't it? (some food for thought)

Hope you enjoyed your Thanksgiving... whatever you did with it...


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Thursday, November 27, 2008

Social services ’set up CCTV camera in couple’s bedroom’

Social workers set up a CCTV camera in the bedroom of a couple with learning difficulties in order to monitor their behaviour, a new report claims.

Council staff are said to have spied on the young parents at night as part of a plan to see if they were
fit to look after their baby, who was sleeping in another room.

The mother and father were forced to cite the Human Rights Act, which protects the right to a private life, before the social services team backed down and agreed to switch off the surveillance camera while they were in bed together.

The case is highlighted in a new dossier of human rights abuses carried out against vulnerable and elderly adults in
nursing homes and hospitals across Britain.

It comes just days after the Government admitted town halls have gone too far in using anti-terror laws to snoop on members of the public.

Recent figures show three-quarters of local authorities have used powers granted under the Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act to spy on residents suspected of putting their bins out on the wrong day, allowing pet dogs to foul the pavement or breaking school catchment area rules.

In the latest case, documented in a report published by the British Institute of Human Rights to mark the tenth anniversary of the Human Rights Act, an unnamed council used CCTV to keep an eye on a mother and father with learning difficulties as their parenting skills were under question.

Social services departments are allowed to place adults in units known as “residential family centres” if they fear their children could be at risk of abuse or neglect. Staff assess the families in a controlled environment to determine whether their children should be taken into care.

The centres can use CCTV cameras as well as
listening devices
but Government regulations state that staff must “respect parents’ and children’s privacy”.

However, the BIHR report claims that the centre in question breached the couple’s right to respect for private and family life, enshrined in Article 8 of the European Convention on Human Rights that was incorporated into English law a decade ago.

The study states: “A learning disabled couple were living in a residential assessment centre so their parenting skills could be assessed by the local social services department.

“CCTV cameras were installed, including in their bedroom. Social workers explained that the cameras were there to observe them performing their parental duties and for the protection of their baby.

“The couple were especially distressed by the use of the CCTV cameras in their bedroom during the night.

“With the help of a visiting neighbour, the couple successfully invoked their right to respect for private life.

However, the BIHR report claims that the centre in question breached the couple’s right to respect for private and family life, enshrined in Article 8 of the European Convention on Human Rights that was incorporated into English law a decade ago.

The study states: “A learning disabled couple were living in a residential assessment centre so their parenting skills could be assessed by the local social services department.

“CCTV cameras were installed, including in their bedroom. Social workers explained that the cameras were there to observe them performing their parental duties and for the protection of their baby.

“The couple were especially distressed by the use of the CCTV cameras in their bedroom during the night.

“With the help of a visiting neighbour, the couple successfully invoked their right to respect for private life.

“They explained that they did not want their intimacy to be monitored and that, besides, the baby slept in a separate nursery.

“As a result, the social services team agreed to switch off the cameras during the night so that the couple could enjoy their evenings together in privacy.”

The BIHR said the case illustrated the way in which the much-maligned Act, which has given birth to a new industry of specialist lawyers and led to convicted murderers and terrorists winning the right to remain living in Britain, had also made it easier for innocent people to have their rights protected without the need for costly court cases.

Ceri Goddard, its acting director, said: “The Human Rights Act is 10 years old and should be celebrated for the positive changes it is making to people’s everyday lives – in our hospitals, care homes and schools.”Have Your Say: Social services ’set up CCTV camera in couple’s bedroom’


Link-
Social services ’set up CCTV camera in couple’s bedroom’

Please read our posting guidelines before posting.

Alternatively you can discuss this report here.

My Two Cents-

The Government is out of control -

THIS RUN AWAY TRAIN NEEDS TO BE STOPED NOW!

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DCF Worker Lies to Police Repeatedly Again

West Hartford, CT - A New Park Avenue woman was expected to spend Thanksgiving in the West Hartford jail after DCF worker lies and falsely accused mother of attempting to kidnap her two youngest children, who are in the custody of the state Department of Children and Families.

Carmen Ramos, 30, of 365 New Park Ave., was having a supervised visit with her children when she told a third child, who is a teenager, to take the two younger children to a nearby park and play with the full approval of the DCF worker. DCF worker continued to lie to police about Ramos saying Ramos allegedly planned to go to the park and take the two children with her even though the DCF worker gave the permission to play at the park.

DCF worker supervising the visit immediately contacted police knowing she screwed up and had to lie to the police in order to look for children. In the meantime, another woman who was there went looking for the children and found them at the nearby park playing. She brought them back to the site of the supervised visit where the DCF worker continued to lie.

As a direct result of the DCF worker lying to police because of her gross incompetence, police falsely charged Ramos with five counts of risk of injury to a minor even though NO child was ever harmed and the children were given permission by the DCF worker, two counts of custodial interference even though the worker gave permission and two counts of second-degree kidnapping even though the worker gave permission. She remained in custody, with bail set at $75,000.

This is how DCF and its workers treat children who want to play in the park on a holiday. By putting the mother in jail by the false statements by the DCF worker who is instructed by her supervisor to make these false statements.

Connecticut DCF Watch
National Civil Rights Advocates For Families
P.O. Box 9775
Forestville, CT 06011-
977-5860-833-4127
Admin@connecticutdcfwatch.comwww.connecticutDCFwatch.com

RELATED -

SENT TO ME BY ANOTHER ADVOCATE.


As I have been telling you, this is the clay foot of the entire system. Expose the money trail. Judges and workers are profitting from these private agencies.

THANK GOD THAT THIS DA, Juan Angel Guerra, HAS THE KNOWLEDGE AND THE WILL TO GET THIS PARTY STARTED!!!

We need to do this county by county across this nation and expose, expose, expose!

I urge you all to think about this as a possibility to make changes in your county and state.

Bless you all,

Martha

As forwarded below.

Pass on to Texas citizens and family rights activists.

The same district attorney (Juan Angel Guerra) who has indicted Dick Cheney in organized crime has decided that he wants to help CPS reform by indicting judges in his area who are participating in organized crime by being attached to CPS foster and adoption agencies. I spoke with him, personally, this morning. By him prosecuting Dick Cheney for profiting off the torture of prisoners in the private prisons he was invested in and using his position to prevent investigation into abuse at the prison, he will be setting the bar for judges and other political officials all through the U.S.A.!


Juan Guerra is selfishly putting himself on the line for our families here! We need to support his efforts so that Dick Cheney's indictments do not get swept under the rug in Willacy County, Tx. He is going to organize a protest outside of the courthouse for December 1st, 2008 and I expect everyone to be there! This is our knight in shining armor, people! In order for the indictments on CPS judges to stick, this first case MUST BE WON! Please contact everyone you know in Texas and get them to be there on December first!

All protestors need to check in with Guerra's office by Saturday so they know what's going on! I know it's short notice; however, this is the case, people! God Bless Juan Angel Guerra for his bravery and excellent character! Please contact Patience for further details at (909) 567-2067, or patalert@ymail.com.

Also, all victims of CPS abuse in Texas are encouraged to contact Patience IMMEDIATELY so that Juan can begin indicting those judges RIGHT NOW!

Thank you!

Sincerely,
C. Patience Summers
(909) 567-2067


patalert@ymail.com
serenahsangels@yahoo.com
http://serenahsangels.co.nr/

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D.A. WILLING TO PROSECUTE CPS JUDGES IN TEXAS! PAT ALERT!

Parents that live in Texas ... or anyone that wants CPS reform this is a MUST READ ARTICLE

AND A MUST WATCH VIDEO!!

YouTube - D.A. WILLING TO PROSECUTE CPS JUDGES IN TEXAS! PAT ALERT!


PLEASE SPREAD THIS VIDEO AROUND TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW WHO WANTS TO REFORM THE CHILD "PROTECTION" RACKET. WE NEED PEOPLE IN TEXAS!!!! WE ARE ALL GETTING TOGETHER DECMBER 1ST. THOSE OF YOU THAT WANT TO PARTICIPATE YOU NEED TO CONTACT PROSECUTOR'S OFFICE AT:

District Attorney
Hon. Juan Guerra
546 W. Hidalgo Ave. 2nd Floor
Raymondville, Texas 78580
Office (956) 689-2164
Fax (956) 689-5280
guerra@willacy.org

A MEETING IS SHEDULED FOR SATURDAY NOVEMBER 29TH.

IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS CONTACT MYSELF OR PATIENCE

KATHLEEN DEARINGER
FAMILIES UNITE 4 CHILDRENS RIGHTS FOUNDATION

Father confesses to killing his 5-year-old son

'He told me that Giovanni was dead' (Boston Globe) Reporter Maria Sacchetti recounts Ernesto Gonzalez's jailhouse confession to her about murdering his son. (Produced by Jason Tuohey)

Click here for video Father confesses to killing his 5-year-old son - Boston.com

MIDDLETON—Ernesto L. Gonzalez Jr. has spent the last three months in a jail cell here refusing to respond to the question that authorities believe only he can answer: What happened to his 5-year-old son, Giovanni, who vanished during a weekend visit with his father in August.

Today, he broke his silence in chilling fashion. During a jailhouse interview with a Globe reporter, Gonzalez confessed to stabbing his son to death and dismembering the small body in the bathtub of his Lynn apartment. He said he then placed his son's body parts into six plastic grocery bags and discarded them in three different trash bins around Lynn. He pedaled from one dumpster to the next on his bicycle.

"I know where he is," Gonzalez said in Spanish, his voice calm and his gaze flat. "My son isn't alive. He's dead."

Asked why he did it, Gonzalez said that it just "happened."

"I didn't want to kill my son," he said. "I don't know what happened in that moment." He said he loved his son and is "regretful."

The extraordinary confession was met with skepticism by authorities, who have yet to find evidence in the apartment that would corroborate Gonzalez's account. The interview followed months of reticence on the part of Gonzalez, who refused to cooperate with investigators, barely spoke during brief court hearings on a child endangerment charge, and declined the tearful overtures from Giovanni's mother to please reveal the whereabouts of her only son.

The disappearance of the ebullient and occasionally rambunctious boy triggered a massive search by air, water and land, from Lynn and Lawrence to Florida and Puerto Rico. Authorities and his mother, Daisy Colon, who lived with her son in East Boston, appealed for help on television, on a donated billboard, and on the Internet. Law enforcement officials in Essex County had described the case as one of the most frustrating of their careers.

This evening, Colon could not be reached for comment.

The Globe reporter arrived at the jailhouse unannounced today and asked guards to see whether Gonzalez would be willing to speak. About 20 minutes later, the reporter was led through security checkpoints to a time-worn visitation room. Gonzalez, wearing a bright orange prison-issue jumpsuit, appeared on the other side of a Plexiglas partition.

The reporter explained who she was and twice displayed her newspaper identification. The interview was then conducted in English and Spanish through a telephone hookup. He spoke for half an hour, until authorities ended the interview because the time allotment was up. The Globe was not allowed to tape record the interview as part of jail policy.

The Globe notified the Essex County District Attorney's office of Gonzalez's remarks shortly after the interview. His confession, while potentially serving as a break in the case, has left authorities baffled and raised questions about whether Gonzalez is even telling the truth. Authorities, up to now, have found no physical evidence of violence committed against Giovanni inside the apartment.


For More ---

Father confesses to killing his 5-year-old son - Boston.com


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Mom follows dark path from icy rescue to murder charge
















Michelle Kehoe was arrested November 15 after leaving the hospital where she had been since the attack.

CNN- Less than a year after four strangers risked their lives to save Michelle Kehoe and her sons from an icy Iowa River, the mother is accused of slashing the two boys' throats and leaving them to die.

Kehoe's 2-year-old son was found dead the morning of October 27 outside the family's van, which was parked a short distance from the Hook-n-Liner pond in Littleton, Iowa.

Her 7-year-old son was injured but still alive inside the van. He was rushed to the hospital for surgery, according to the Iowa Department of Public Safety.

Scars on his neck underscore the chilling account he gave police, contained in a police affidavit filed in Buchanan County court. The boy said his mother started with him, taking him from the van before covering his eyes, ears and mouth with duct tape, according to the affidavit. Then, he told police, she cut his throat.

She then moved on to his younger brother, he said. He could hear his brother's cries as she repeated the attack on him, the 7-year-old told police.

Kehoe initially denied involvement in the attacks, blaming them on a stranger. Eventually, she admitted to acquiring the knife and duct tape weeks earlier but could not explain why, the affidavit says.

Kehoe faces life in prison on charges of first-degree murder, attempted murder and child endangerment resulting in serious injury. She is being held on $2.5 million bail, County Attorney Allan Vander Hart said. She has not entered a plea but is scheduled for arraignment December 2.

Repeated calls to Andrea Dryer, Kehoe's public defender, were not returned. CNN was unable to find any public comments by Dryer on the case.

The attacks have rattled the community of Coralville, a suburb of Iowa City where Kehoe and her husband, Eugene, lived with their sons.

The arrest comes just three months after Iowa Gov. Chet Culver honored four men for diving into the Iowa River to rescue Kehoe and her sons on a cold December afternoon last year.

The governor's office gave the following account: Kehoe was driving the boys to the library when the car hit the curb, skidded on ice and then plunged into the river. As rushing waters filled the car, three passers-by who had watched it veer off the road plunged after it into the icy waters.

Inside the car, Kehoe dislodged her older son from his booster seat and passed him through the window to Cory Rath, who brought the boy ashore. Kehoe removed her younger son, then 14 months old, from his car seat and handed him out the window to Mark Petersen. Petersen began to swim with the boy and then passed the boy to Josh Shepherd, according to the governor's office.

Kehoe, meanwhile, had escaped from the car and was fighting the rough currents pulling her underwater. Bicyclist Steve McGuire noticed her struggling and dropped his bicycle to dive in after her.

The dramatic rescue formed a bond between the Kehoes and their four saviors, especially Rath, who befriended the family. He did not respond to CNN's phone calls but spoke recently with a local television station.

"Your heart sinks to hear that something was happening again," Rath told KGAN, a television station in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. "I mean, we just rescued these kids and mom from the river last December."

Rath told KGAN he was grateful that the older boy had survived but worried about the rough times ahead for him.

"Dying at the age of seven would have been really, really tragic," he told KGAN. "I'm also saddened that there are certainly difficulties he will have in the days and years to come that are troubling to think about."

Police have said they are not re-examining last year's accident in light of the recent attacks on the boys. Prosecutor Vander Hart would not comment on whether they were related.

The 2-year-old's slaying also marks the first homicide in five years in Buchanan County, the prosecutor said.

"Murder cases are pretty few and far in between here. We're a small rural community of 21,000 people," Vander Hart said. "Any time you have a case with these kinds of facts, it's going to draw some kind of attention. But I was not prepared for this degree of attention."

For many, the grisly nature of the attacks is compounded by the fact the boys' own mother is charged with plotting and carrying them out.

Cases of mothers who kill their children, like Susan Smith and Andrea Yates, continue to fascinate the public, even as the rates of filicide -- the act of a parent who kills his or her own child -- have remained fairly stable.

"Because these cases are so tragic, they pull at your heartstrings, but they happen all the time," said Laurie Levenson, a professor at Loyola Law School in Los Angeles, California.

In 2005, 555 children under the age of five were victims of homicide, compared with 544 in 1976. The rate peaked in 1991 at 778 and bottomed out in 1971 at 511, according to statistics from the Department of Justice.

Another fairly stable statistic: In more than 50 percent of child homicides, the killer is a parent.

"The natural defense to anticipate is insanity, because why would a mother kill her own child?" Levenson asked. "It certainly can be insanity, but it's not always the case. Perfectly sane people can do horrible things, and they do, every day."

Mothers can be motivated to kill their children by several factors, according to criminologist James Alan Fox, Lipman Family professor of criminal justice at Northeastern University.

Some act on genuine psychotic delusions, as jurors determined to be the case with Texas mother Andrea Yates, who told doctors she drowned her five children because God told her to do so. Others can be motivated by selfish reasons: Susan Smith's alleged motive for killing her children was that she perceived them to be an obstacle in her relationship with her boyfriend.

"It's a crazy thing to do, but crazy describes the behavior, not the mind," Fox said, adding that between 300 and 350 children have been homicide victims in 2008.

"It doesn't make sense to most of us, but that doesn't mean the state of mind of the person is mentally ill. You may know what you're doing and have very selfish motivations," he explained.

Kehoe said she couldn't explain why she did what she did, according to the affidavit. Police said she initially told a false but chilling tale of how a normal, two-hour Sunday drive to visit relatives was interrupted by a brutal attack on her family.

On that Monday morning in October, she showed up on the doorstep of a home in Littleton, claiming that a man she couldn't identify had abducted her and her children. The person who answered the door called 911, and sheriff's deputies located the van with Kehoe's help.

Initially, she denied involvement in the attacks and stood by the statement that she'd been attacked by a stranger.

When pressed by investigators, however, Kehoe said she had purchased a knife a month earlier and duct tape two months earlier, the affidavit states. The document also says that before she and her sons left home Sunday, she wrote a note detailing the abduction by a stranger.

The note was found in the van, according to the affidavit.

The document went on to say: "She stated that it all happened within five minutes and prior to 1:30 pm. She stated she couldn't explain why she had done it. She stated that she couldn't face anyone. She stated that she wanted to die or be locked up where she couldn't hurt anyone."

After speaking with investigators, Kehoe was taken to the hospital to be treated for her own wounds and trauma, said prosecutor Vander Hart, declining to elaborate. She remained there until she was arrested and taken to jail a week ago Saturday.

A plea of not guilty would open the door to a criminal trial, where Kehoe's state of mind would become a key issue, experts say.

Michael Welner, a forensic psychiatrist and Chairman of The Forensic Panel, interviewed Andrea Yates and testified for the prosecution at her trial. He said the successful insanity defense in Yates' case made what was once an "unthinkable" strategy into a viable defense.


Mom follows dark path from icy rescue to murder charge - CNN.com

My Two Cents for what it's worth.

I don't think last years "accident" was an accident in light of the above story, why do I think they will find out she tried to kill them last year as well. (shrug) my opinion and a few bucks will getcha on a subway ...

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Sunday, November 23, 2008

A Challenge

Once again this morning... something I read sparked a fire under my ass..

So here it is .. this really pissed me off first thing this morning..

Below is a google alert I received for Parent Alienation

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The new mental disorders?

Atlanta Journal Constitution - GA, USA

Not real, says the National Organization for Women: “Parental alienation really is a dangerous and cleverly marketed legal strategy that has caused much ...

See all stories on this topic

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This post is being posted not only as one of those posts that make ya go Hmmmm

But to ask the National Organization for Women (NOW) how they sleep at nite knowing how many abused women have been alienated from their children that they NOW refuse to help- I speak from experience (In 2003 I contacted them pleading for help as an abused woman who was being alienated from my children by my abuser - although at the time I didn't know anything about Parent Alienation or the devastating results that our children suffer Parent Alienation Syndrome.

So here goes.. the question of the century... for any member of NOW that would like to answer.

How can you oppose Parent Alienation and Parent Alienation Syndrome so desperately when on the flip side you are comfortable saying that men are using the system to abuse women and are successful.. then you go on to state that women can and do become alienated/estranged from their children in situations where abuse and divorce collide .. but you stand firm that PA/PAS is a "cleverly marketed legal strategy that has caused much ..."

I'd like to as you to take a moment and listen to yourselves.. your argument is ridiculous.. insulting.. and dangerous to all.. ESPECIALLY ABUSED SPOUSES AND OUR CHILDREN!

Note in the above paragraph I used the word ABUSED SPOUSES not abused women.

Therein lies the problem in my not so humble opinion ...

If (most of) these groups would stop acting like mindless, spineless, robots that simply repeat what the head masters script says .. they would see that both men and women abuse.. both men and women get abused, both men and women, usually with some kind of serious personality disorder can and will alienate/align the children and most importantly... OUR CHILDREN ARE BEING ABUSED BY THE MILLIONS AS A RESULT OF THOSE GROUPS .. INSANE CONTROVERSY!

Now don't listen to me .. I'm a 6th grade uneducated ass hole .. what do I know.. (shrug)

Research the topics below for yourself..

First take a look at my detailed definition on the who what when where and why ...
of Parent Alienation Syndrome in this link...
Disgusted with the system: Parent Alienation Syndrome

This link below is another mom that has been alienated and her version of the Obsessed Alienator ..
http://parentalalienation.blogspot.com/2008/11/understanding-obsessive-alienator-part.html

Then if any one's been paying attention.. NOW claims that what happens to alienated children is Stockholm Syndrome or Trauma Bonding ..

So on that note -- take a look at Dr. L.F. Lowenstein's 2006 article below..
The comparison of parental alienation to "Stockholm syndrome

Then take a look at some articles on Trauma Bonding ...
Trauma Bonding : The Pull to the Perpetrator

Don't miss these articles Parts 1-4 on PAS -
Disgusted with the system: PARENT ALIENATION 1 2 3 and 4 OF 4 written by Mitchell Rosen

Also don't miss this link.. where you will hear from an ex female alienator and an adult child of alienation ... Disgusted with the system: Alienation

Another great article - by Dr Amy Baker-
Disgusted with the system: Parent Alienation Syndrome- The Parent/Child Disconnect

Here you will find an excerpt from a Dr treating an adult survivor of being alienated back in the 1940's where he describes what happens to those children and what they felt while siding with/ aligned with or being alienated from ..
Disgusted with the system: The life-long lasting effects of PAS noted in 1948?

Here you can read about my wake up call..
Disgusted with the system: Just Realizing I was a Victim of Parent Alienation Syndrome

Here you can read about - the realization I had just before I was diagnosed with Complex Post Traumatic Disorder - all related to being the victim of an abuser - first by DV then by his alienating my children with his political connections help.

Disgusted with the system: What happened to that spark?

The read the links below on what it's like to suffer from Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Disgusted with the system: Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Disgusted with the system: Search results for complex post traumatic stress disorder

Ok here's the challenge for those within the "NOW" or anti PA/PAS groups...

WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE WHAT YOU CALL IT -- OUR CHILDREN AND THE TARGET PARENT (EITHER MALE OR FEMALE) ARE BEING ABUSED BY CULT LIKE SOCIOPATHS/MALIGNANT NARCISSISTS WHILE THE REST OF US SIT AROUND WITH OUR FINGERS UP OUR ASSES FIGHTING A GENDER WAR AND A NAME FOR THE ABUSE!

Alternatively, is it all about what happened when Gardner first coined the term PAS.. and immediately NOW stomped their foots and cried .. women don't abuse they are protective parents .. they wouldn't dare be evil enough to turn children against their father..

PLEASE PEOPLE WAKE UP BEFORE TO MANY MORE LIVES AND GENERATIONS ARE DESTROYED!

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Saturday, November 22, 2008

Prosecutor seeks to drop charge against young murder suspect
















UPDATE -

(CNN) -- An Arizona prosecutor Friday asked to dismiss one of two murder charges against an 8-year-old boy suspected in the shooting deaths of his father and another man.

Apache County Attorney Criss Candelaria filed a one-paragraph motion in juvenile court to drop the murder charge accusing the boy of killing his father.

The motion gave no reason for the request, saying only that "the state believes the interest of justice will be served by such a dismissal."

Phone calls to Candelaria were not returned Friday, and the judge in the case has issued a gag order.

The motion broadened the mystery surrounding the case, which began November 7, when the boy was charged with killing his father, Vincent Romero, 29, and Tim Romans, 39, who rented a room in Romero's home.

Police have said the boy confessed to shooting the men with a .22-caliber handgun and released a videotape of the boy's interview with police.
Watch the boy speak to investigators »

Sitting cross-legged in an armchair, the boy initially denied involvement in the shootings. He said he found Romans lying on the ground when he arrived home from school and ran inside calling for his father.

"And then I went upstairs, and then I saw him, and there was blood all over his face, and I think I touched it," the boy said. "And I didn't hear anything, and I just saw blood, and I cried for about 30 minutes, just crying right next to him."

But later on the tape he said he shot his already wounded father "because he was suffering."

The two officers questioning the boy press him to tell the truth, with one saying at one point, "If you're not honest with me, if you're not truthful, it's not going to look good."

The boy appears to admit to shooting his father, saying, "After I shot him once, he was still moving. I think I shot him again."

The boy has not entered a plea in the case. One of his defense attorneys said he was not read his rights and did not have an attorney or a parent present during questioning.

Police have not responded to those claims.

If the motion to dismiss is granted, it would leave open the possibility that the charge could be refiled.

Prosecutor seeks to drop charge against young murder suspect - CNN.com

Related-

Experts Doubt That 8-Year-Old’s Taped Confession in Double Killing Is Admissible - NYTimes.com


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Friday, November 21, 2008

Inter-American Commission on Human Rights

Is everyone aware of the.. Inter- American Commission on Human Rights?

This is where Jessica Gonzales took her case after the highest Courts decided she did not have a right to be protected by the police from her abusive husband.. when she called them numerous times trying to get her Order of Protection enforced.

Sound familiar? - Well if that sounds familiar either you have read about the Gonzalez v United States or you've read those very words here on my blog- It appears my estranged husbands political connections to the Panepinto's may just have something to do with the fact that no matter how much documented proof I've brought to the Police or the D.A's of my estranged husband violating not only State but Federal VAWA laws.. they've chosen to protect the abuser!

Well I spent some time last nite reading this web site-
What is the IACHR?

For those of you that seem to be unable to get justice.. I suggest you read them as well.. among other fantastic information .. you will find



AMERICAN DECLARATION OF THE RIGHTS AND DUTIES OF MAN

(Adopted by the Ninth International Conference of American States,

Bogotรก, Colombia, 1948)


WHEREAS:

The American peoples have acknowledged the dignity of the individual, and their national constitutions recognize that juridical and political institutions, which regulate life in human society, have as their principal aim the protection of the essential rights of man and the creation of circumstances that will permit him to achieve spiritual and material progress and attain happiness;

The American States have on repeated occasions recognized that the essential rights of man are not derived from the fact that he is a national of a certain state, but are based upon attributes of his human personality;

The international protection of the rights of man should be the principal guide of an evolving American law;

The affirmation of essential human rights by the American States together with the guarantees given by the internal regimes of the states establish the initial system of protection considered by the American States as being suited to the present social and juridical conditions, not without a recognition on their part that they should increasingly strengthen that system in the international field as conditions become more favorable,

The Ninth International Conference of American States

AGREES:

To adopt the following


AMERICAN DECLARATION OF THE RIGHTS AND DUTIES OF MAN
Preamble

All men are born free and equal, in dignity and in rights, and, being endowed by nature with reason and conscience, they should conduct themselves as brothers one to another.

The fulfillment of duty by each individual is a prerequisite to the rights of all. Rights and duties are interrelated in every social and political activity of man. While rights exalt individual liberty, duties express the dignity of that liberty.

Duties of a juridical nature presuppose others of a moral nature which support them in principle and constitute their basis.

Inasmuch as spiritual development is the supreme end of human existence and the highest expression thereof, it is the duty of man to serve that end with all his strength and resources.

Since culture is the highest social and historical expression of that spiritual development, it is the duty of man to preserve, practice and foster culture by every means within his power.

And, since moral conduct constitutes the noblest flowering of culture, it is the duty of every man always to hold it in high respect.

CHAPTER ONE

Rights

Article I. Every human being has the right to life, liberty and the security of his person.
Right to life, liberty and personal security.

Article II. All persons are equal before the law and have the rights and duties established in this Declaration, without distinction as to race, sex, language, creed or any other factor.
Right to equality before law.

Article III. Every person has the right freely to profess a religious faith, and to manifest and practice it both in public and in private.
Right to religious freedom and worship.

Article IV. Every person has the right to freedom of investigation, of opinion, and of the expression and dissemination of ideas, by any medium whatsoever.
Right to freedom of investigation, opinion, expression and dissemination.

Article V. Every person has the right to the protection of the law against abusive attacks upon his honor, his reputation, and his private and family life.
Right to protection of honor, personal reputation, and private and family life.

Article VI. Every person has the right to establish a family, the basic element of society, and to receive protection therefore.
Right to a family and to protection thereof.

Article VII. All women, during pregnancy and the nursing period, and all children have the right to special protection, care and aid.
Right to protection for mothers and children.

Article VIII. Every person has the right to fix his residence within the territory of the state of which he is a national, to move about freely within such territory, and not to leave it except by his own will.
Right to residence and movement.

Article IX. Every person has the right to the inviolability of his home.
Right to inviolability of the home.

Article X. Every person has the right to the inviolability and transmission of his correspondence.
Right to the inviolability and transmission of correspondence.

Article XI. Every person has the right to the preservation of his health through sanitary and social measures relating to food, clothing, housing and medical care, to the extent permitted by public and community resources.
Right to the preservation of health and to well-being.

Article XII. Every person has the right to an education, which should be based on the principles of liberty, morality and human solidarity.

Likewise every person has the right to an education that will prepare him to attain a decent life, to raise his standard of living, and to be a useful member of society.

The right to an education includes the right to equality of opportunity in every case, in accordance with natural talents, merit and the desire to utilize the resources that the state or the community is in a position to provide.

Every person has the right to receive, free, at least a primary education.
Right to education.

Article XIII. Every person has the right to take part in the cultural life of the community, to enjoy the arts, and to participate in the benefits that result from intellectual progress, especially scientific discoveries.

He likewise has the right to the protection of his moral and material interests as regards his inventions or any literary, scientific or artistic works of which he is the author.
Right to the benefits of culture.

Article XIV. Every person has the right to work, under proper conditions, and to follow his vocation freely, insofar as existing conditions of employment permit.
Right to work and to fair remuneration.

Every person who works has the right to receive such remuneration as will, in proportion to his capacity and skill, assure him a standard of living suitable for himself and for his family.

Article XV. Every person has the right to leisure time, to wholesome recreation, and to the opportunity for advantageous use of his free time to his spiritual, cultural and physical benefit.
Right to leisure time and to the use thereof.

Article XVI. Every person has the right to social security which will protect him from the consequences of unemployment, old age, and any disabilities arising from causes beyond his control that make it physically or mentally impossible for him to earn a living.
Right to social security.

Article XVII. Every person has the right to be recognized everywhere as a person having rights and obligations, and to enjoy the basic civil rights.
Right to recognition of juridical personality and civil rights.

Article XVIII. Every person may resort to the courts to ensure respect for his legal rights. There should likewise be available to him a simple, brief procedure whereby the courts will protect him from acts of authority that, to his prejudice, violate any fundamental constitutional rights.
Right to a fair trial.

Article XIX. Every person has the right to the nationality to which he is entitled by law and to change it, if he so wishes, for the nationality of any other country that is willing to grant it to him. Right to nationality.

Article XX. Every person having legal capacity is entitled to participate in the government of his country, directly or through his representatives, and to take part in popular elections, which shall be by secret ballot, and shall be honest, periodic and free.
Right to vote and to participate in government.

Article XXI. Every person has the right to assemble peaceably with others in a formal public meeting or an informal gathering, in connection with matters of common interest of any nature.
Right of assembly.

Article XXII. Every person has the right to associate with others to promote, exercise and protect his legitimate interests of a political, economic, religious, social, cultural, professional, labor union or other nature.
Ri
ght of association.

Article XXIII. Every person has a right to own such private property as meets the essential needs of decent living and helps to maintain the dignity of the individual and of the home.
Right to property.

Article XXIV. Every person has the right to submit respectful petitions to any competent authority, for reasons of either general or private interest, and the right to obtain a prompt decision thereon.
Right of petition.

Article XXV. No person may be deprived of his liberty except in the cases and according to the procedures established by pre-existing law.

No person may be deprived of liberty for nonfulfillment of obligations of a purely civil character.

Every individual who has been deprived of his liberty has the right to have the legality of his detention ascertained without delay by a court, and the right to be tried without undue delay or, otherwise, to be released. He also has the right to humane treatment during the time he is in custody.
Right of protection from arbitrary arrest.

Article XXVI. Every accused person is presumed to be innocent until proved guilty.

Every person accused of an offense has the right to be given an impartial and public hearing, and to be tried by courts previously established in accordance with pre-existing laws, and not to receive cruel, infamous or unusual punishment.
Right to due process of law.

Article XXVII. Every person has the right, in case of pursuit not resulting from ordinary crimes, to seek and receive asylum in foreign territory, in accordance with the laws of each country and with international agreements.
Right of asylum.

Article XXVIII. The rights of man are limited by the rights of others, by the security of all, and by the just demands of the general welfare and the advancement of democracy.
Scope of the rights of man.

CHAPTER TWO

Duties

Article XXIX. It is the duty of the individual so to conduct himself in relation to others that each and every one may fully form and develop his personality.
Duties to society.

Article XXX. It is the duty of every person to aid, support, educate and protect his minor children, and it is the duty of children to honor their parents always and to aid, support and protect them when they need it.
Duties toward children and parents.

Article XXXI. It is the duty of every person to acquire at least an elementary education.
Duty to receive instruction.

Article XXXII. It is the duty of every person to vote in the popular elections of the country of which he is a national, when he is legally capable of doing so.
Duty to vote.

Article XXXIII. It is the duty of every person to obey the law and other legitimate commands of the authorities of his country and those of the country in which he may be.

Duty to obey the law.

Article XXXIV. It is the duty of every able-bodied person to render whatever civil and military service his country may require for its defense and preservation, and, in case of public disaster, to render such services as may be in his power.

It is likewise his duty to hold any public office to which he may be elected by popular vote in the state of which he is a national.
Duty to serve the community and the nation.

Article XXXV. It is the duty of every person to cooperate with the state and the community with respect to social security and welfare, in accordance with his ability and with existing circumstances.
Duties with respect to social security and welfare.

Article XXXVI. It is the duty of every person to pay the taxes established by law for the support of public services.
Duty to pay taxes.

Article XXXVII. It is the duty of every person to work, as far as his capacity and possibilities permit, in order to obtain the means of livelihood or to benefit his community.
Duty to work.

Article XXXVIII. It is the duty of every person to refrain from taking part in political activities that, according to law, are reserved exclusively to the citizens of the state in which he is an alien.


Duty to refrain from political activities in a foreign country.
It goes on ... click here for the rest... Basic Documents - American Convention

#1 Diagnosis for Antipsychotic Drugs?




Antipsychotic drugs are not just used "a lot" for "ADHD".

Usually "ADHD" is the top diagnosis (or near the top) when psychiatrists prescribe antipsychotic drugs.

Pharmalot
Treating ADHD In Maine

By Ed Silverman
November 20, 2008


Earlier this week, the FDA advisory committee slammed the rising use of antipsychotics in youngsters, particularly to treat attention deficit disorders. The meds, you see, were approved by the agency for schiozphrenia or bipolar disorder - and only recently for youngsters, in some cases (back story).

The trend, however, to prescribe these meds for teenagers and children has actually been widespread, with Medicaid programs in several states reporting rising expenditures for antipsychotics to treat ADD or ADHD. A report issued last year by the University of South Florida found that among children 5 years or younger, 53.8 percent were prescribed antipsychotics for a diagnosis of ADHD. The figure was 48.8 percent for children between 6 and 12 years old (see page 22).

The issue is gaining attention because the meds can cause weight gain and metabolic disorders, and the FDA committee complained current warnings are insufficient. The meds include Johnson & Johnson’s Risperdal, Lilly’s Zyprexa, AstraZeneca’s Seroquel, Bristol-Myers Squibb’s Abilify and Pfizer’s Geodon. As we have written previously, a consortium of state Medicaid directors is evaluating the use of the drugs in children to ensure they are being properly prescribed (take a look).

And now we have another example. In Maine, spending by the state Medicaid program on each of the five widely prescribed antipsychotics has been rising for children 18 years and younger since 2000, except for Zyprexa. At the same time, ADHD has been the number one diagnosis among the same population each year, except for last year, when prolonged post-traumatic stress disorder was more widely diagnosed. See the chart. The data is courtesy of the Office of Maine Care Services.

Comments can be made here: http://www.pharmalot.com/2008/11/psychotic-reaction-treating-adhd-in-maine/


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Thursday, November 20, 2008

Ethics panel investigating Rep. Tom Burch

State Rep. Tom Burch, D-Louisville









By ROGER ALFORDAssociated Press

FRANKFORT, Ky. — A Kentucky legislator may have run afoul of state law when he wrote to Kentucky Court of Appeals judges, asking them to reverse a ruling for one of his constituents in a child custody case, a state ethics commission said Monday.

The Kentucky Legislative Ethics Commission found probable cause to believe state Rep. Tom Burch, D-Louisville, violated a law that bars legislators from using their positions to try win special treatment for themselves or others. The ethics panel scheduled a public hearing next month to listen to evidence in the case.

If the panel finds that Burch did break the law, he could be reprimanded. The panel could also refer the case to law enforcement.

Burch, chairman of the House Health and Welfare Committee, wrote a letter on official stationery to three appeals court judges asking them to reconsider a judgment terminating the parental rights of one of his constituents. The judges recused themselves from the case after receiving the letter.

The ethics panel scheduled a public hearing for Dec. 16 to hear evidence in the case. Chairman George Troutman told Burch’s attorney, David Kaplan, that the commission won’t consider a plea bargain.

“The commission considers this very, very serious and not to be taken lightly,” Troutman said.

Burch met privately with the ethics panel for more than an hour Monday.

“My motives were pure in writing a letter for a citizen facing a very difficult time in her life,” Burch said in a statement. “My service as legislator has been dedicated to representing the underdog. I do not believe my actions violated any laws. This proceeding is in it’s early stages, and I look forward to telling my side of the story at the hearing.”

The ethics panel brought the complaint against Burch after Court of Appeals Judge Jeff Taylor notified a staff attorney about the letter.

Burch, in a preliminary statement to the ethics panel, acknowledged that he sent the letter to the judges. But he said he “did not have the conscious objective to use his position as a state representative to obtain any special privileges” for the constituent.

Troutman said the ethics panel found sufficient evidence to order next month’s hearing based on a state law that prohibits lawmakers from having contact with judges pertaining to active cases “when the contact is designed to influence the outcome of the proceeding.”



Ethics panel investigating Rep. Tom Burch : Bluegrass Politics

My two cents-

This poor man - didn't someone tell him that the apparent goal of America is to destroy families and children so the next generation will be so numb that they would be perfect soldiers?

I've searched and searched to figure out why-- or how those involved in protecting families and children can so easily stand by and watch innocent parents lives fall apart before their very eyes.

How they can have no feelings when parents are accused of things they have never done- then have their children ripped from their arms -- never to see them again?

The only answer I can find is money- power- and pure greed!

Then you have to think of what's going to be in 10 or so years?

THE PERFECT SOLDIERS - EMOTIONALLY NUMB!

Things that make ya go --- Hmmm

Thanks Pat for sharing this story with me!

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PARENT ALIENATION 1 2 3 and 4 OF 4 written by Mitchell Rosen

I began posting one and two of a four part article from MITCHELL ROSEN tonite I came accross parts three and four.. so here goes .. 1-2-3-4 all here in one place.

Mitchell Rosen, M.A., is a licensed marriage and family therapist with practices in Corona and Temecula. Contact him at
family@PE.com

Parental Alienation Part 1 of 4

One of the most difficult and gut-wrenching types of counseling I have ever attempted involves repairing parental alienation. When a young child has been told repeatedly how bad, dishonest, evil and selfish the "other" parent is by the parent they live with, it is a

huge uphill battle to try and bring the alienated parent back into a relationship with the child.

If the parent who has been pushed out of a child's life attempts to come back in, this mother or father must somehow convince the child that not only is no harm intended but that the only security the child has ever known is not at risk.

Many kids will tell the parent they do not know, "Stay away. I hate you. I know you just want back into my life so you don't have to pay child support. My mom (or dad) has told me about your tricks so don't even try and talk to me!"

Greeted with this type of hatred, many parents fire back with, "That's just your mother (or father) talking. You are being brainwashed. You can't possibly remember times when I abused you, neglected you or abandoned you because it never happened!"

A young child hearing his or her feelings being invalidated this way quickly becomes on the defensive and shouts back, "These are MY feelings, no one is telling me what to say!"

Then we have the classic stalemate of trying to repair parental alienation. If, in fact, the alienated parent did not abandon or abuse their child but was somehow kept from them either by deceit or financial manipulation of the judicial system, then the alienated parent must somehow access a child who, very often, does not want to be accessed.

When it is clear the child is fearful that opening his or her heart will result in the custodial parent feeling betrayed, this kid is in an awful spot. The counselor must appeal to the custodial parent to be supportive of a reconciliation and basically give the child permission to love both parents.

Unfortunately, when the power struggle between parents has gone on for years and is complicated by court battles, infidelities and other troubles, it takes a Herculean effort to get the custodial parent to see they are only hurting the child by perpetuating the polarization.

When any counselor believes the alienated parent is not a threat to the child and is trying to do the right thing by re-entering the kid's life, they may recommend re-starting visitation even though the child does not wish to. This is sometimes the only way a counselor can give the child what they deserve: a mother and a father committed to being in their lives in a healthy and loving manner.

Parent Alination Part 2 of 4


Digging into kids' alienation

I have written frequently about parental alienation syndrome, a term used primarily in child-custody cases. Parental alienation syndrome (PAS) happens when one parent alienates or brainwashes a child against the other parent.

Therapists realize PAS may be present when the child has no ambivalence, no discomfort at all vilifying or demonizing the parent he or she has been taught to hate. The child will say things like, "My parent is always selfish, only cares about themselves, never even tries to be fair to the 'good' parent."

A child who is truly victimized by PAS has no problem being abusive toward the hated parent and often cites petty or even manufactured reasons to justify cruelty toward this parent. A boy or girl who has a parent who is truly abusive or neglectful may also feel anger and desire little or no contact, but their emotions are all over the place; riddled with longing, sadness, guilt and not usually punctuated by a pervasive desire to protect the good parent.

Most kids want to love both their parents. But when a child has been taught to hate one, the words the child uses to describe the vilified parent often show this.

Kids who have been brainwashed may use lots of profanity, simplicity and cruelty in the way they describe the parent they believe to be "all bad."

It's one of the ways therapists attempt to identify if parental alienation syndrome has taken place or if the child is justified in not wanting contact with the parent he or she professes to hate.

I have counseled hundreds of parents who claim PAS, but really they are just abusive, neglectful or self-absorbed parents. Since PAS is not yet a recognized disorder, a clever parent with an even smarter lawyer may shout PAS when the kids want little to do with them. This could be to avoid paying child support or simply to wreak vengeance on the ex.

It takes a lot of time and patience to sift through all the accusations and counteraccusations to ferret out whether a child is wise to avoid the parent or has been indoctrinated to hate and fear this parent. Sometimes kids hate their parents for all the right reasons. But when a child is brought into my office proclaiming to totally hate one parent and sees nothing but good about the other, my radar goes up.

Often I'll see judges temporarily award custody to the parent the child prefers until sufficient counseling can occur. But unless the counseling also involves the alienated parent, any report the counselor may write is likely to be biased and probably useless. Any counseling potentially involving PAS should be done by a therapist familiar with the dynamics and not easily taken in by one side.

Parent Alination Part 3 of 4

Rosen column: Put kids first in divorce

Children who are victims of parental alienation syndrome are likely to become emotionally damaged. For me this is the hardest part of doing counseling in PAS cases. Children need and deserve a mother and a father. To intentionally deny a child access to a parent for bonding, love and interaction is a loss for that child.

If parents respected and enjoyed their partners, they would still be married. For that reason it is no surprise most divorces are ugly. Yet, I have seen many parents put their own pettiness aside to assure their children do not suffer. The parents make it a point to let their child know Mom and Dad can still communicate and wish their child well when it is the other parent's time with the child.

It should not be hard to understand that kids need to look up to their parents. So, when one parent bad-mouths, misinterprets or intentionally misrepresents the other, this behavior results in a confused and anxious child.

There are lots of ways that PAS messes with the minds of children. If a parent instills in a child the belief that the other parent is evil, then what does that do for the self-image of the child? He or she is then the son or daughter of an evil person and no child should be burdened with that legacy.

When a parent wrongly convinces the child the other parent is out to hurt him or her and will stop at nothing until they are bankrupt, lose custody or are physically damaged, the child learns it is now his or her role to protect the targeted parent. Children deserve innocence, and their childhood is robbed from them when they are taught to protect their parent instead of being protected.

Kids will quickly learn to play one house against the other and often discover that bad-mouthing one parent to the other is a way to get attention and affection.

Another destructive behavior in PAS triangles is a parent calling the police about alleged abuse. The children associate police officers with one of their parents getting into trouble and it is not unusual for kids to see their mother or father led away in handcuffs.

Often the officers will enforce court orders, as they are obliged to do, but these orders may be written as temporary stopgaps until more thorough psychological evaluations can be completed. Unfortunately, these evaluations can take months to finish and the backlog in Family Court means it may be many more months before the psychologists and therapists are able to educate the court.

Meanwhile, there is a terrific tug of war with children being put in the role of savior, prosecutor, therapist and confidant. None of these are healthy roles for a child losing his or her family through an acrimonious divorce.

There are not enough inches in this column to delineate all of the ways children are victimized by PAS other than to point out, long after the divorce is complete, the kids may be left with only one parent and that parent is often the one with serious emotional problems.


Parent Alienation Part 4 of 4.

Reversing Alienation

It is almost impossible to know if a child has truly been victimized by parental alienation syndrome (PAS). There is no test for it, no X-ray can be examined and lengthy psychological evaluations have a certain amount of subjectivity regardless of the clinician's efforts to be impartial.

Assuming a parent is able to convince the court his or her child has been manipulated into hating him or her, then what? If the child is 15, 16 or 17 years old, the chances of reversing the alienation are not great. Just hearing from a court-appointed psychologist that alienation has occurred would not take away the child's anger, mistrust and apprehension.

If the alienated parent is successful in educating the court that he or she has been unfairly separated from a child, he or she then faces the choice of either leaving the child with the parent responsible for the alienation or risking further estrangement by forcing the child to move.
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Switching custody to the estranged parent, completely and suddenly, is referred to as immersion therapy. The child is immersed into the custody of the parent he or she has been taught to fear. Not only is the child in the care of a parent he or she may not have seen for years, but an essential part of the therapy is to either limit or stop any contact with the parent the child has known as the "good" parent.
For immersion therapy to be successful, the alienating parent must either be denied any contact or have all interactions with the child monitored and supervised so further alienation cannot take place.

A therapist skilled in working with alienated children monitors all discussions about the family. It may take months, maybe even close to a year, before the child exhales and relaxes into the care of the parent he or she used to loathe and fear.
The good news is that it is possible to reverse alienation. The child must also be given individual therapy to sort through the myriad of feelings he or she will experience when understanding how the once-trusted parent could have violated his or her trust so completely.

Each child responds differently. Some, especially younger children (younger than 10), may be able to adapt fairly quickly. Other children may need an inordinate amount of reassurance, patience and stability, with no outbursts of parental anger. Rages from the formerly estranged parent will only reinforce the notion that the child should fear the parent, that he or she really is emotionally out of control. The parent should remember this is a time when the child needs stability and consistency above all else.

No therapist who makes a recommendation for immersion therapy does so easily. The consequences are grave and the risks considerable. The only thing that could be worse would be to leave an innocent child with a parent so emotionally ill that the child will learn most of life's lessons backward.

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Experts: Interrogation of boy, 8, 'out of bounds'


UPDATE -

(CNN) -- The third-grader's legs dangle at times from an overstuffed chair as he answers the questions of two female police officers. His manner and voice are casual, even helpful, but his words are shocking.

And so, legal analysts say, were the methods police used to obtain them.

By the time the boy was finished talking, say police in St. Johns, Arizona, he'd confessed to a premeditated double murder.

The 8-year-old is charged in juvenile court with killing his father, Vincent Romero, 29, along with Tim Romans, 39, a man who rented a room in Romero's home. Police have said the boy confessed to shooting the men. He has not entered a plea.

He will be allowed to leave a juvenile jail for 48 hours to spend Thanksgiving with his mother, a judge ruled Wednesday.

The furlough will start at noon November 26 and end at noon on November 28, Apache County court administrator Betty Smith told CNN.

Legal analysts who spoke with CNN were united in their opinion that the police questioning was improper and that any incriminating statements the boy made shouldn't stand up in court.

A review of the tapes shows that the boy's demeanor was more suitable for a session of show-and-tell than for a soul-baring confession as he describes the carnage he saw inside his home. He does not appear to be depressed, scared or sorrowful.
Watch police interrogate the boy »

The body of his father's roommate was sprawled downstairs, he says. He ran through the house, shouting, "Daaaad! Dad!" His father was lying dead upstairs.

"There was blood all over his face, I think, and I think I touched it," he tells the officers. He showed them how he prodded his father's body with his foot, checking "to see if he was a little bit alive."

Watch the boy describe the scene »

Then, he says, he sat by his father's body and cried for half an hour.

Later, as the police officers' questions become increasingly pointed, the boy says he shot the men. He says he shot his father a second time "so he wouldn't suffer."
Watch boy say he shot his "suffering" dad »

That statement came, several analysts agreed, long after the camera should have been shut off and the boy advised of his rights to keep silent or consult a lawyer. Even then, they said, it is doubtful a child that young could understand those rights.

Nowhere on the tape, which police call a confession, is the boy read his rights. No parent or guardian is present as he speaks.

"The law enforcement conduct in this case is inexplicable: from interrogating a third-grader without the presence of a parent or other adult to releasing an inflammatory videotape before a trial," said Jeffrey Toobin, CNN's senior legal analyst.

"It's important, of course, to protect society from dangerous people of whatever age, but this case has been handled in such a way that seems to disregard the major challenges of dealing with such a
young suspect," Toobin added.

Sunny Hostin, another CNN legal analyst, agrees. "I've never seen anything like this," she said. "This is never how it's done. This was completely out of bounds."
Watch why the interrogation is troubles Hostin »

A judge in Arizona has issued a gag order prohibiting police and prosecutors from commenting further on the case. Although authorities once planned to try the boy for murder in an adult court, the case has been referred to juvenile court, where the proceedings are less transparent.

Still, there's the tape.

As the questioning begins, the boy is treated more like a witness than a suspect. One of the officers advises: "I have to tell you the truth. I can't lie. Debbie can't lie, and you can't lie to us. We're just gong to be talking truth, OK? We're not going to make anything up. We're just going to be honest, OK, even if it's bad stuff, OK? We just need to tell the truth, just us, in this room."

"I'm comfortable with the way they approached the beginning of the interview," said CNN law enforcement analyst Mike Brooks, a former homicide detective. But the questions became more confrontational as the interrogation continued.

At some point, he said, the boy stopped being a victim or a witness and became a suspect. That's when he should have been read his rights, Brooks said. That's when a parent or legal guardian should have entered the room, he added.

He said the turning point on the tape comes when the officer expresses doubt over the boy's story about not being home at the time of the shootings: "You're sure?" one officer asks. "Because I heard something that somebody said that somebody was calling your name and you weren't answering."

At that point, Brooks said, the interview turned into an interrogation.

Children are highly suggestible and require different handling, said "In Session" anchor Lisa Bloom, who represented sexually abused children as an attorney. Children are eager to please, she said, anxious to give adults the answers the child thinks the adult wants to hear.

"Cases are legion where juveniles have been coerced into making false confessions," she said. "All you have to do with an 8-year-old is make it clear what answer you want."

In this case, the officers made it clear that the boy's initial description of what happened wasn't the answer they were looking for, she added.
Watch Lisa Bloom say interrogators were leading the boy »

Bloom points to other cases in which false confessions were coerced from juveniles. Notable among them, she said, was the case of Michael Crowe, a teen who falsely confessed to killing his sister near San Diego, California. A transient later was convicted in the slaying.

In the Crowe case, as in the Arizona case, the police videotaped the statement. Bloom said that should occur in all juvenile cases.

Apache County Attorney Christopher Candelaria said the tape was released because it was considered public record.

But he did not elaborate on why authorities would consider the police interrogation of an 8-year-old to be public record. Juvenile proceedings usually take place behind closed doors.

At the end of the tape, the boy buries his face in his jacket as one officer asks, "You OK, sweetie?"



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