I am begining a new section over there on the links-
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SURVIVORS THAT HAVE BEEN ALIENATED FROM THEIR CHILDREN.
So if you have a blog and you are a survivor of Domestic Violence please send me your blog for inclusion.. I want to prove to those women that PA/PAS is very real and destroying our children!
Resource centre holds service for victims of violence
Mary-Ann Rowan left her abusive husband seven years ago, and is now sharing her story to help other victims of abuse and violence. She spoke at the Western Ottawa Community Resource Centre's annual vigil on Dec. 6, the national day of remembrance and action to end violence against women.
"Now I look back and I know he won’t destroy me."Candles lit to honour women who were victims of violence and abuse flickered in the cold wind last weekend on the 19th anniversary of the day 14 women were killed at Montreal’s École Polytechnique. The Western Ottawa Community Resource Centre held their annual vigil on Dec. 6, the national day of remembrance and action to end violence against women.
Mary-Ann Rowan, who has first-hand knowledge about emotional abuse, spoke to the 25 who braved the dropping temperatures and stiff wind about the importance of empowering women to take back control of their lives.
“If I can do it – anyone can do it,” she said.
Once Rowan understood that she was in an abusive relationship with her husband of 15 years, she looked for an opportunity to escape.
“I left with my three children, my purse and a flashlight,” she said of that winter night almost seven years ago. “I knew once I had left I wasn’t going back.”
Rowan stayed in a women’s shelter, then with family. She has slowly rebuilt her life and even volunteered her time at the resource center as a peer helper.
“I decided to give back,” she said. “I thought I could help someone in some small way.”
Her journey wasn’t without setbacks, however.
Her two older children have returned to live with their father, and Rowan hasn’t seen them in several years.
She called the form of abuse “parental alienation” and said it’s similar to cult brainwashing. Her kids have refused to hear her side of the situation, but Rowan holds onto hope that they will understand the truth eventually.
Her now ex-husband also tried to take their youngest child – who will be 12 in February – but Rowan exercised her custody rights and got her daughter back.
She is focused on ongoing court battles right now, but hopes to resume volunteering when she can.
“I have to keep myself healthy … and help others when I can,” she said.
While the vigil was cold, the feedback was warm as people expressed their gratitude for Rowan’s story. She said through the support and lessons from the women at the centre, she has regained her self-confidence, and appreciates opportunities to encourage others.
“No one deserves to be treated badly,” she explained. “Everyone deserves respect.
“When living it you don’t see it, it’s just about survival,” she said of abusive situations. “Now I look back and I know he won’t destroy me.”
How do these women's groups keep denying Parent Alienation Syndrome.. when more and more survivors are screaming from the roof tops that it IS VERY REAL and it is the ABUSER that alienates when the victim leaves!
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